My question is this: how many out there have discussed, or will discuss, their stances for their own Living Will, DNR, and/or death wishes with not just their spouse/significant other, but their parents, siblings, and even friends?
Now, I am not married, and I am an only child. But, I cannot conceive of not discussing these issues with my parents, nor even with some of my best friends. As a matter of fact, I have. They are aware of my wishes and my documents. One set of friends locally (my parents live in NJ) have the power to execute those documents. My HMO has those wishes on record, as well.
I find it very unrealistic that Terri Schiavo never discussed her wishes with anyone but her husband if she was serious. Sure, she was very young at the time, early twenties. But, were she very serious, might she not have discussed this with her parents, siblings, her pastor, even her friends? One would think so. Might she not have drawn up a Living Will? Yet no one other then her husband claims to know what her actual wishes were. So, why can we not err on the side of life?
All she needs is food and water. Same as a baby does. A baby cannot live without the same care that Terri needs. Or those who are quadriplegic. Severely mentally handicapped. And many others. She is not on life sustaining machines, such as for breathing, or kidney failure, such as Tom Delay’s father, which is the new meme by the Left. Delay’s father was kept alive by intravenous tubes and breathing equipment. He would have needed to be hooked up permanently to a dialysis machine when his kidney’s failed. The Left is trying to use this as a case of hypocrisy by Delay, but, as usual, they forgot to read the entire LA Times article.
Doctors conducted a series of tests, including scans of his head, face, neck and abdomen. They checked for lung damage and performed a tracheostomy to assist his breathing. But they could not prevent steady deterioration.
Then, infections complicated the senior DeLay’s fight for life. Finally, his organs began to fail. His family and physicians confronted the dreaded choice so many other Americans have faced: to make heroic efforts or to let the end come.
So, he was not in the same condition as Terri. Like Terri, he had not Living Will or DNR. But, again, unlike Terri, his family knew of his wishes. Not just his wife, but his family. So, what we have here are two completely different situations that the Left is trying to use for their nefarious, oppose Bush agenda. Imagine if this was a convicted mass murderer, though. They would be fighting for his life. Since Terri committed no crime, she is apparently not worthy of the same benefit to life to them.
So, back to my question. How have you handled this?
Lunch: 3/28/2005
Try one of these specials with your lunch: Sortapundit is raising money and letting you help select the charity. Assumption of Command responds to The Command T.O.C. Bobo Blogger muses on marriage. Down for Repairs looks for suggestions regarding the
Lunch: 3/28/2005
Try one of these specials with your lunch: Sortapundit is raising money and letting you help select the charity. Assumption of Command responds to The Command T.O.C. Bobo Blogger muses on marriage. Down for Repairs looks for suggestions regarding the
Well, hoping that this spurs many younger people on to set up this documentation. Who knows what Terri did/did not say to her husband in the privacy of their relationship?
I still contend that if she were an 86 yr old woman, there would not have been any outcry. Yet, if life is *all* important, why not?
I have advance directives with my doctor, my brother, and my sister, also there’s a red notebook in my bookcase at home that says “In case I am DEAD” (with a little skull and crossbones you would be proud of, Teach). It’s there for anyone going thru my house looking for my will, or medical wishes. Because I would NOT want to be in Terri’s place.
Pirate–I used to not think that this was an important issue until I started working in the medical field. The first time I saw family members arguing over what the patient truly wanted, I realized the importance of making your wishes known. It is hard, as the other Julie said, to know what was said, maybe in passing between spouses. My husband and I often enough while watching something on TV or the like have said “I don’t think I’d want to live like that.” It meant nothing at the time but could in the future. However, despite what may or may not have been said between the two of us in the privacy of our home, we both have it clear and concise as to our final wishes. How can you not..especially if there are children involved. My parents are the same way. The last thing they want to be going on is my brother and I at odds in the event of a tragedy. It’s hard enough as it is. In Terri’s case, we’ll never know the truth I don’t think. I think there is more involved on her husband’s part than having her best interests at heart but I don’t know him personally so I guess it’s not nice to judge him (but I still will.) I think the biggest tragedy is for Terri..I have no doubt that her mind is working..she may not be able to put thoughts into speech but I do believe that she has some cognitive function. She has to know what is going on..that’s she’s being allowed to die and what if she doesn’t want to die..what if she knows that Michael Schiavo is the one who caused her to be in this state and now he’s made the choice to let her die. Poor thing..it’s a very sad thing to me. Case in point, you should always have your wishes in writing. I just makes sense.
I have a living will and a power of attorney for health care that is consistent with the fact that I am also a Catholic, in that it conforms to the pronouncements of the Church that Catholics need not take “extraordinary” measures to prolong their lives. This document is in the files of my primary care physician, the nearest hospital to my home, and the three friends who are designated in the documents.
One thing I think people should consider when having this document prepared is the people being selected and protecting their own consciences and emotional wellbeing. In my own case, I have one friend who lives very close to me and who has been my friend for 40 years. I KNOW that yes – if necessary and warranted – she could pull the plug. I also know that she would agonize over it evermore. My sister, on the other hand, would consider MY WISHES more important than her own desires and could, therefore, honor my wishes without becoming haunted by it. So she is the primary person. Having the living will and POA for healthcare is important, but choosing your designees is just as important.
Thank you all for your comments. Too be honest, it was really along the lines of what I was expecting. A major decision like this is something that most people discuss with others at some point. It’s not something undertaken lightly, and those that really consider it are certainly going to make sure that more then one person knows, whether it be family, friends, a doctor, HMO, someone. Michael Schiavo might be telling the truth, but it is only his word on a life and death decision. We’ll never know.
William, if we receive no other benefit from this human tragedy, it is she may not have died in vain. If many of us finally face this uncomfortable topic and make the legal and ethical decisions for ourselves and families then she will have done this country a great service.
We just posted about this today too. I’m not sure people realize how easy this is to do. You don’t need an attorney, you just need two witnesses. Wisconsin, where I live, has the forms for a living will and Power of Attorney for Health Care online. I’m sure most states do. You don’t have to be in a Terri Schiavo position for this either. If you have aging parents it’s so much better to talk about it now than argue about it when you’re in a stressful situation later.
I think people should consider when having this document prepared is the people being selected and protecting their own consciences and emotional wellbeing.
Only peoples ya !!