But, then, we knew Liberals are generally devoid of any humor, especially regarding politics. Their idea of “funny” is jokes about assassinating George Bush and jokes about Conservatives dying.
(The Blaze) In a speech at the Texas GOP Convention in Fort Worth, Texas, on Friday, Sen. Rand Paul (R-Ky.) cracked a joke at Democrats’ expense that’s sure to rile up his political opponents.
“Mr. President, you love to trade people,†Paul said, according to Politico. “Why don’t we set up a trade? But this time, instead of five Taliban, how about five Democrats? I’m thinking John Kerry, Hillary Clinton, Nancy Pelosi…â€
The crowd reportedly erupted in cheers. (snip)
When he was later asked about the comments during a news conference, Paul reiterated that he was only joking about trading Democrats. He also included a joke in his explanation of his previous joke.
“It was a joke. Except for Nancy Pelosi, I was serious about her,†he said, later adding, “Well, I mean, it’s humor, and I hope there’s room for humor. I thought it was funny. It was meant to be humorous.â€
Democrats think it’s the height of humor to raise taxes on Someone Else. The Blaze includes some Liberal tweets which show typical liberal outrage. In the Politico article comments we see
- How about 2 Cubans and an Indian posing as Americans and a couple of screaming harpies. Cruz Rubio Jindal Bachman and Palin (If a Republican wrote that, Liberals would claim raaaaacism)
- Rand Paul is Buzz Windrip the very politician Sinclair Lewis predicted would eventually rise to power and become America’s Adolf Hitler: “When fascism comes to America, it will be wrapped in the flag and carrying the cross”–It Can’t Happen Here
- I can top that Rand – lets just BOMB THE FOCK out of the next GOP get-together in Texas. That would leave me in stitches :)
- You sound like a another delusional tbag birther bs artist, FYI 80 % of Americans want nothing to do with the inbred lying idiocy of the racist, bigoted, misogynist, homophones tbags, you’re a flake outcast freaks are not fighting for anything except your own weird oddball racist agenda that the majority Americans will never support, are you curious as to why Palin loves black kock.
Actually, I suppose they do have a sense of humor. They voted for Obama twice. (OK, that was an easy joke) The real problem with Liberals and politics are that they are way too intense. There’s no middle ground for them. Everything is an assault. Everything is racist, sexist, homophobia, some sort of “ist” or “phobia”. Any disagreement with Obama is treated like The End Of The World and The Worst Thing Ever. They get worked up like someone threw their puppy off the Empire State Building on almost every subject. You are Not Allowed to criticize the government in their world. Everything is entirely too hardcore.
Crossed at Right Wing News.
Humor is effective if it intersects with the range of intelligence and experiences of the audience.
For “Dyslexics untie!” to be funny you have to know what dyslexia is (or at least is thought to be) and how to spell ‘unite’.
“How can you tell the difference between a chemist and a plumber? Ask them to pronounce unionized.” Which is funny only if you know that scientists often refer to molecules as ionized or un-ionized.
And those that are the butt of a joke usually are less amused.
When President Obama commented that people were advising him to sit and have a drink with Mitch McConnell, and Obama replied with a perfectly cadenced and hilarious, “Why don’t YOU have a drink with Mitch McConnell!”, I bet McConnell and conservatives didn’t think that was very funny.
Jokes:
1. A Yankee, wanting to get away from it all, buys a ranch in Texas, and sitting in the swing on the porch one day, spies a pick-up speeding up his dusty, mile-long drive way. The truck stops, and a Texan hops out of the truck, waving, smiling, and says,
“Howdy neighbor, sorry to bother you, but I just want to welcome you to the county, and invite you to a one-time get-to-know-your-neighbor soiree at my ranch tonight. I better warn you though, these thangs can get kind of wild – there’ll be dancin’ an’ drinkin’, fightin’ an’ fuckin’!”
The Yankee asks, “Thanks, neighbor – sounds crazy. What should I wear? Can I bring anything?”
The Texan drawled, “Just bring yourself! I got all the fixin’s. Oh, and it don’t matter much whatcha wear… it’s just gonna be me and you.” (Drew Carey)
2. Q: What time is it?
A: Do you mean right now? (Stephen Wright)
3. Waffle House is like a gas station bathroom… with waffles. (Jim Gaffigan)
4. Obama: Health Care Plan Would Give Seniors Right To Choose How They Are Killed (The Onion)
5. A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: “Ugh, that’s the ugliest baby I’ve ever seen!’ The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: ”The driver just insulted me!” The man says: “You should go up there and give him a piece of your mind. Go ahead, I’ll hold your monkey”.
6. Dick Cheney fell down a wishing well. I was amazed, I never knew they worked.
7. I once had dinner with Bobby Fisher at an Italian restaurant with checkered tablecloths. It took him two hours to pass me the salt.
8. A woman walks into a gym, “Can you teach me to do the splits?”
Instructor said, “How flexible are you?” She said, “I can’t make Tuesdays”
9. Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn’t seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls 911. He gasps, “My friend is dead! What can I do?” The operator says “Calm down. I can help. First, let’s make sure he’s dead.” There is a silence, then a gun shot is heard. Back on the phone, the guy says “OK, now what?”
10. DEA officer stops at a ranch in Texas, and talks with an old rancher. He tells the rancher, “I need to inspect your ranch for illegally grown drugs.” The rancher says, “Okay, but don’t go in that field over there,” as he points out the location.
The DEA officer verbally explodes saying, “Mister, I have the authority of the Federal Government with me.” Reaching into his rear pants pocket, he removes his badge and proudly displays it to the rancher. “See this badge? This badge means I am allowed to go wherever I wish. On any land. No questions asked or answers given. Have I made myself clear? Do you understand?”
A short time later, the old rancher hears loud screams and sees the DEA officer running for his life chased by the rancher’s big Santa Gertrudis bull.
With every step the bull is gaining ground on the officer, and it seems likely that he’ll get gored before he reaches safety. The officer is clearly terrified. The rancher throws down his tools, runs to the fence and yells at the top of his lungs .
“Your badge. Show him your BADGE!”
11. A man is sitting at a bar. He turns to the woman next to him and asks, “Do you wanna hear a good blonde joke?”
The woman says, “Hold on a minute. See that woman a couple seats down? She’s a black belt in karate, and she’s blonde. See the woman sitting next to me? She’s a champion kick boxer, and she’s blonde. And I’m a pro wrestler, and I’m blonde. Now, are you sure you still want to tell that joke?”
The man says, “Well, not if I have to explain it three times.”
12. Two guys are walking through the woods and happen onto an old well. They decide to test how deep it is and pick up a old heavy log and toss it down the abyss. As they watch it disappear into the void, they hear a commotion behind them and see a mule running straight at them at full speed and jump down the well. They were stunned. A few minutes later a farmer walks out of the brush and asked them if they’d seen a mule. They told the farmer that a mule just jumped down the well, and he said “That couldn’t have been my jenny, she was tied to a big log”.
13. I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, ‘Where’s the self-help section?’ She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.
14. Will Rogers never met Ted Cruz.
15.
Now J, that was a real decent and good post.
And if liberals had any sense of humor or the ability to analyze comments, or yet, the ability to analyze anything, then we’d have alot more harmony in the world. We’d have fewer public school issues where 0-strikes rules are initiated without a moment’s thought on kids carrying poptarts.
Kids do the right thing and still get in trouble because liberals are unable to analyze actions, read between the lines, or act on their own.
And they have long touted themselves as the free-thinkers. Now, that’s funny right there!